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The Road To Simple Truth (Developing Unshakeable Courage and Strength)

 

 

By Dr. Brenda Shoshanna October 2007

 

As the level of stress and confusion in society and relationships escalate, we need to find a new way to deal with difficulty more urgently than ever before. Rather than live from the epidemic of fear, lies and games most are in the grip of, it is worthwhile to take time to discover steps to living in simple truth. If we do not do so, our sense of well-being becomes impaired , as does our ability to live constructively with hope and well-being. Once we step on this new road, no matter what conditions we face, our life becomes authentic and fulfilled.

This new road is not a series of ideas, beliefs or practices, but the very heart of who we are. When we live from this basis, certain changes take place. We no longer proclaim one thing and live another. We do not use spiritual tenets or practices for denying our deepest reality and truths. We face on another honestly, and do not use the other as an object to fulfill our own personal needs.

This road has many steps and winding pathways. To begin, a few steps are described below:

 

To straighten someone, do a harder thing - straighten yourself.

The Buddha

When in contact with others, do not attempt to change or improve them. Look at each person who comes as your teacher, a gift you are receiving, which allows you to see another aspect of yourself. Rather than viewing the person as an object, find the place where the two of you are fundamentally one.

As we walk on this simple road, we do not assume the role of authority. Rather than become judge, jury, teacher or wise one, we relate simply as ourselves and simply join the other in their experience. By being with the person in this manner, not only do we give honor to the other, but are honoring this person as part of ourselves..

Who is wise? He who learns from others.

Pier Ke Avot

 

Judge Everyone Favorably

Pier Ke Avot

Individuals absorb the way we perceive them. When we feel hopeless about them, they feel it and tend to respond hopelessly. If, instead, we see their strength and beauty, not only they, but we too, are lifted into another vibration - of hope and strength.

What we pay attention to increases. The more we focus upon what is powerful and healthy in others, the more we will not only bring good faith into relationships, but experience that in our own lives as well.

This road teaches us that when we see negativity in others, we must step back and realize this negativity is within ourselves. We do not project it onto them. No matter how great their disarray, each person contains great possibility. If we cannot see this, it is our problem, not theirs.

 

Be Entirely Honest With Yourself And Everybody

He was powerful, not because he dominated the scene, but because he was true.

Buddha

It's easy to get trapped into the power game and unwittingly dominate others. Not only does this take true power from us, it destroys our own ability to live simply, with wisdom Without humility there is no real possibility of finding that which truly guides our lives. We start by realizing that we do not have anyone's answers or life direction. By allowing others to give us their power, we are taking away their responsibility for their own lives and weakening them. This is a very great trap.

 

Train In Your Own Authenticity

As we train in our own authenticity, a true sense of value and meaning appears in our lives. We are humbled many times, and in this process, realize where our own wisdom and strength are coming from. Day by day we are given many opportunities to strip away the lies, ego, illusions, masks, and the feeling we have the absolute truth. As we become more humble and simple we then become fitting vessels for true strength and love to enter our lives.

The practice of walking on this simple road is the practice of become fully present, totally available to ourselves and others, being with life one hundred per cent. Each encounter becomes an opportunity to practice, to lift others and be lifted as well. As we have deep faith in others, others will have deep faith in themselves and our own faith in life will develop as well. Our steps will become sturdy, wherever we walk, we will be well. This is a sacred trust which grows inevitably as we walk the simple road.

Discover the surprising truths about love that will save your relationships, in Dr. Shoshanna’s new e-book Save Your Relationship (21 Basic Laws of Successful Relationships).

Dr. Shoshanna is a psychologist, relationships expert on iVillage.com, speaker, and author of many books, including The Anger Diet, (30 Days To Stress Free Living), Zen And The Art of Falling In Love, (Simon and Schuster), Why Men Leave (Putnam), and many others.  You can contact her, or visit her personal website.

 


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